Enjoyable Weekend..

I am back again..well I did enjoy myself this week and I feel that it is the happiest week I even had for this few weeks..

I went out with my family yesterday to east coast to have seafood and then we head down to the beach to have a walk and I have the urge to play bowling at marine bowling..guess what..Mum wasnt so keen on it at 1st so I started it with Xiao Jie..end up she joined us and enjoyed it haaa..lol and we played 3 sets of game..all the way til midnight abt 2am..then we headed home..cool ar? hardly stay outside so late lor..Happy Hour! We went to have food abit late..around 9 plus and when we finished was abt 11 so we played all the way til 2am..I was tired then and I slept at 4am this morning hhaa..Glad that MUm know how to bowl and perhaps we can go some other days to relax.I know she feel relaxed and happy..It is the right choice to go bowling and she is fine though it is the lst time..

After that sunday which is today I meet Hui,Ling & WL to have a chat at Glorie Jean Cafe at 2pm..We plan to have it at starbucks but it is so crowded so change of plan ya..just have a small get together..Happy weekend and I really enjoyed it..
I really need some entertainment since I been working OT lor.. yeah..

K la end here..a bit tired ..going to slp earlier today..

Work..Work..Work..

Today I just feel tired..haha partly I slept late last night :P well is kind of tired to keep checking stuff..I wonder how to endure til 8.30pm tml and fri..I am going work OT..need to rush our work and I am going finish mine soon..probably can finish my part tml ba..hopefully..should be no problem when I am seriously working and dun talk :P I can do other stuff once completed..frankly speaking I did quite alot of work? yeah especially the internal part..so much to key but I manage to finish it..OMG!

Currently I am watching "天涯侠医"..mm..I didnt really catch it when channel 8 is showing during weekend..manage to catch a bit of it and realise is nice..So watching dvds lor.I didnt catch Hk drama quite long liao due to work etc..yeah back to my addiction of watching haha..I can really glue to the tv :P and cant wait to watch on..sometime no choice but have to stop as I need to slp..If not I surely watch til I really feel tired..well is an enjoyment to do wat u like.yeah..
I like Nick Cheung who act as doctor..I believe he hasnt been acting nowaday ,isnt he? Nick can act well and he do look like wat he act as be it doctor or police hhee..the character suits him..well the drama is quite a few years back..

Sometime certain topics can be sensitive to me nowaday..I dun wish to hear abt it nor think abt it but colleagues talking abt it , I just dun care so much..I dun wish to think so much and want to be happy. I feel alright, very normal lor..I was quite happy last night to meet up to celebrate a simple 中秋节..

希望我能开开心心得过每一天..然后工作顺顺利利..不想想那么多..希望我身边的人都平安..

Quite hard and slow to type in chi but I did it :) End here..

中秋节快乐!!

Today is a simple day with work and guess wat..OT is coming when we least expected it..I have to cancel my program for fri..sigh..no choice..working OT on thur, Fri & Sat..probably next week too b4 our chalet..sigh..sometime shouldnt say too much and end up it comes true..wat the..work is coming..

Well wishing everyone 中秋节快乐!!! Today's weather is fine to celebrate lantern festival..WL asked if I want to meet up to take lantern..I join her and we brought her niece to the park near our place..We just walk around and I bought lantern for her niece..manage 2 find mickey mouse one..hehe..yeah..

My colleague , Mei Na went to get those small lantern and decorate our office..yeah we can feel the atmosphere..then we bought mooncake to share and try diff. types lor..I still have some in the office..perhaps can eat it tml when we r hungry.
It is Kareen's birthday tml..so we having cake..It is kind of nice lor that colleagues will celebrate ur birthday..

Suddenly feel that I may have some thoughts or feel a bit sad as I am hearing "Would u be there"..It is a nice song and I find it so meaningful..cant help feeling a bit 伤感..nvm is ok..

K end here..

Time..

I realise everyone including me is complaining that there isn't enough time to rest. I rest for a day then I am back to work.wat to do,I have to work on sat too..so to me..sat is occupied with work and church..so no personal time..Time is spent with God..Sunday is the only day I can rest and I am lazy to go out.I have my free time..stay at home do wat I like..Can say I am kind of isolating myself? hhaa maybe? Coz I may be invited to birthday party but I dun wish to go nowaday unless the person is my colleague, close friends or relatives..dunno lah..I just dun wish to go and there is no particular reason..I just feel sian..not close wat..

I know that there is changes for this few weeks and though I smile and laugh at jokes, I dun think I am back to my normal self yet..I am trying to be..I dun wish to talk abt it and think abt it..U guys will know what I am talking abt..certain things just leave it aside..time will heal everything and work is more impt now..wow I have not been going out for this two weeks..nvm is ok..I just wish to rest and I will go out next fri hee..a date? ya right with Mei Fen :P haha..Just meet up to have a meal n shop around..yeah.

Today is a day for me to play com, read bks/bibles or watever..cool..make full use of my free time..the feeling is shiok but time just pass by very fast..I love to stay in my room..sometime will have a chat with mum..great!

Well not forgetting to thank friends whom stand by me when I feel down..especially my bro..Thx my dear bro for lending me a listening ear..sorry to trouble u so much..
I appreciate it..

I end here

Worried..

Quite a few days has past but to me I still feel the same..think a lot.. I really worried when I heard he is sick..but glad that at least u will share with me..if I dun msg u perhaps u dun wish to tell me?? sorry I cant be beside u to look after u..I cant enter ur camp..if not I surely look after u no matter wat..dun care u want or not..is my sincere thoughts..may God bless that u get well soon..poor thing.. make my heart ache la..shouldnt be like that..But I dun feel at ease..worried if anything happen to u..trust me, I wont feel gd de..I know u need someone now when u r sick..I know how it feels to have stomach flu..I simply cant be there right now..feeling so sad lor..that I want to cry..Pls pls take care of urself while I am not by ur side now..

Anyway working life is the same lor as usual..
I end here..

Life is unpredictable..

Today is just a normal resting day for me..I didnt go anywhere..I am feeling better..hope I am just be fine lor..can be tense up this few days..not normal isnt it? thx 4 ur concern..Somehow I feel that sometime life is not within our control..some things may happen, then it shall happen..is just that we wont be aware when it happens..I know I am not scare..I am prepared..I am just worried abt my love ones..my family,friends and not forgetting u..I will be worried abt u no matter wat..
should anything happen to me,我放不下你们!

There are disasters happening around and hard to predict when it happens..just like the plane which had crashed in Thailand killing abt 60 pple..It makes me worried coz he will be flying to Australia for some overseas training..Plane seem to be so unsafe lor..I just wish he is safe n sound that's all..I know I shouldnt have negative thoughts but I really afraid to lose u forever..*touch wood la..at least, I can still contact u n care for u now..
But if u aint around,I dun think I wish to live either..humans have feeling de..after all we been together for a period of time..another diaster is the earthquake..

Earthquake can really kill pple and my block can feel the shake..is terrible as it is not once..many times within 3 days..I felt the shake thrice..This time is terrible that pple in neighhood countries like Malaysia and Thailand can feel it too..May God bless that there will be lesser disaster and that pple r safe n sound..

Relationships..

I am not sure how's my feeling right now..perhaps I just lost my true self and may take a period of time to be back to normal..Life just goes on each day..there isnt much changes..I just have to adapt to it..这世界有天长地久吗? 哈哈..我觉得没有..人总有一天会离开这个世界的..we wont know when..

World is realistic..sometime is better to be friends rather than couples..this is how I feel..at least better..let says couples break up, they wont even be friends..True?so wat the point..It make both parties miserable only..
Is it true that everyone may experience that and u just have to overcome it and move on? I dunno and dun wish to care anyway..Certain things we still need to solve it be it bad or wat..rather than making it worse..I have solved my problem..

Let me update abt yesterday..I went to MSQ for dinner and bowling with bro this time..I know I didnt enjoy it but as promise to meet up ya..I went to relax myself..I dunno la..I dun seem to be able to concentrate on watever I do this few days..I just wish to keep myself occupied lor..that's all..yeah..no point thinking and work is as normal..occupied all day ..work is always there and we wont be able to finish it..btw We celebrate Restine's birthday in advance today during tea break and we have cake n pizza..we chip in for the cake..mosse cake..did I spell correctly??

Alright dunno wat else to blog..end here..

Thoughts on Sunday...

Today is a rest day whereby I feel that I think alot.There are couples of hrs for me to think abt stuff,even in church. I just have some thoughts but dun wish to share with anyone there. personal matter..no point saying..just let it be..

Heard from some pple,that being single and alone is the best as u have lots of freedom..It is true..there are advantages and disadvantages..maybe u guys will feel I have traditional mindset that being single can be lonely..is true when u are old..but having a family isnt that great either if ur children treat u badly..heard of some incidents like that..maybe is just too early to talk abt that..but I feel that when we still have a chance to make a right decision, is gd to think clearly when u want to get married or wat..somehow, even finding the right guy seem difficult..Friends do tell me u dun have to find, it will just come..

Sometime pple will tell u maybe the one u are finding is always beside u just that u dun notice it..Is that so? I dunno..I still feel that gd ones maybe not be found at times..either taken or extinct..

Friends tell me dun look down on myself that I am not gd or wat..we should feel that we are gd in our own ways and have confidence in ourselves..I still feel that in a way charming guys or moderate looking guys still wont look out for me..Maybe I said that becoz I didnt see any yet haha..really..my circle of friends is small.sigh..
somehow dun wish to think abt this but avoiding is also not gd for me..I love freedom
and perhaps the only way to feel happy n be firm is when u find the one and u are sure that he & u think that u two can spend the rest of ur life together..It is still early n I am still young..I still have time so let it be just as it is lor..
leave it to fate and hope I can be lead to the right one..

Now talk abt work..as usual..picking up more work and doing it while I learn..is great..so far is fun being with my colleagues..they can really crack jokes..hope we have a happy time working together..

End here going have my lunch..

Work..

Another week has come..Today is tue..haa I work til I almost forget that today is tue..I even ask my colleague wat day is it..lol..so blur right? yeah that's me when I am too engross??

I am going to do a quick blogging and have my lunch and catch 7pm drama.. well time being, work is still not busy so dun have to work OT..I hope I dun have to do it often and probably not for the lst few months of work for now..I am still picking up..so far so gd..just cut n paste some index into dividers and photocopy documents today..I still have quite alot to do though..Boss ask someone to help me though but is ok..He doesnt come n help out also..so is ok.I can manage it myself..just need some time..I guess I can get it done tml..yeah then I can do other work..horray..prefer to key in data..I can do it faster.. :)

Working nearby is really gd..save time..I can get home around 6 coz I have to get my own dinner..if not I reach home at 5 plus..shiok..anyway is already earlier than last time..I can catch 7pm drama on time..rest earlier..wake up half an hr later..I even lie in bed a while today til my mum thought I didnt not wake up..she wake me up..lol..lazy la..I am so tired though I try to slp slightly earlier last night..nvm..

Thank god for the blessing and hope that the job will continue to be smooth and everyone work together cooperatively and happily.. I shall end here..time for my dinner..hungry!! Xiao zhu is hungry haa...

Updates about weekend again..

I am back again..one week just pass like that..let me update regarding wat I did this few days..I started picking up more things on thur..which is gd..keying in more data..learn more things of course from scratch since I am new..better than 1st two days ba..slowly picking up..yeah..

I have to work for half a day today..nothing much..coz sat is used to have some lectures and discussions when we dunno anything..Boss sat down n teach us stuff..we have a clearer view with regards to our work..hhaa spend 2 hrs doing there..so nothing much..have to do housekeeping..wat the..become cleaner cum admin asst..lol..2 in 1..save money! 省省省!!! haiz..wat to do..company too "thrifty"..put it in a nice word..Lst time kind of doing housekeeping for an office..sigh..nvm..
there are some incidents etc along the way for my lst week..so can I say is filled with interesting things?? haha..I went to visit 外婆 after work..then heard down to church as usual..is great to be back on sat whereby I wasnt there for sat @ 7 for two weeks..wat a day today..It just passed by like that..so fast..

I realise I begin to be more willing to go down to church though I am tired..I know sometime I am lazy due to work that I dun wish to meet LM so early for our studies but then have to..But I make it a point to turn up on time..I did..yeah..she is late for 5 mins..nvm..I dun think I have the habit to touch my bible very often as in to read it..opps..dunno leh..feel tired after work..so is tv..online a while and I slp liao..excuses?? really la..I dun even wish to read newspaper/magazine or storybk not to say bible..opps..

I do have some thoughts when the church service is over.anyway watever it is..I dun wish to think alot for watever matter..just let it be..just like work..just let it be and see how..slowly pick up my learning as times goes by..I shall end here..going out tml with dear..

3rd day of work..

Well today is the 3rd day of work..I am blogging during my lunch break..have to do a quick one coz I am going back soon wor..

Anyway let me talk abt lst n 2nd day..1st day slack la..then start checking some measurement stuff..today do index stuff..every morning there is meeting..haiz..waste some time la..no wonder they have to do OT :P haha..
I am learning how to read this n that..those terms that I consider weird de..never hear b4..lol is great to learn marine stuff..though we do more on keying in stuff..It takes time though..I was tired to update my blog yesterday so take this time to update hhaa..that's abt it ba..Hopefully everything turns out fine..

I do get along with colleagues so far..so ya..hope it keep on going like that..yeah..k end here..go back to work le..

Weekend..

I am back again to update my blog regarding yesterday & of course today..

I was free yesterday as I go for church service today instead of yesterday ya..
I went out with Dear to MSQ to play bowling..I wasnt very gd at it though but practise makes perfect..haha..it was alright after all..is just having fun..We played 3 sets of games which is abt 2 hrs..I went to get Ice Caffe Mocha from starbuck to share b4 heading down to bugis's tong shui cafe to have some food..went b4 with WL..yeah this time I tried the 通心粉..the soup is nice and not oily..gd for health..they have veg, egg and tofu in it..Dear ate de chicken chop rice seem very nice also..maybe I can consider trying it next time? ;) shall see..Plan to ask Mummy along next time to try the food there as well as the dessert..I didnt try the dessert yet..The八宝茶 not bad..2nd time drinking it..

Anyway after that shop lor..I react in a way that make dear angry..sigh..but he is fine after that..He is like that de..I also dunno..anyway we are fine..I went back home quite early..manage to catch 2nd half of the CSS2..expected that Shawn will win..He has a lot of supporters..sometime I feel competition is never fair due to voting..is just a comment anyway not trying to say anything or criticise any contestant in my blog..

Update abt today..I went for sunday service at 8am..this is the lst time I am attending sunday service.Jolene & my cousin was asking the week b4 whether I would like to join them..end up both of them didnt attend the service lor..sigh..放我飞机咯!
so sad..Jolene busy with children church..last min thing..cousin haa overslept..nvm is ok la..I join Lai Mei for service lor..The service is abit more serious than sat at 7..It is totally different from Sat's service.I still prefer to go for sat's service..better for us.. :P I can feel sleepy at Sun@8 lol..I still feel alright for sat..After service, there is fun fair..sort of family day..I join in the fun since I am there..bought the coupon and end up cant finish using it..I give it to Lai Mei's son..hehe..

K I shall end here..going take a short nap..a bit tired as I wake up early..Bye..

My feelings..

It is fri again..time just flies past..时间一分一秒就这样过去了..the day is drawing nearer and I try to rest as much as I can..
So can say I am feeling excited and worried..mix feeling ya..I know what I am worried about..everyone has 2 try to adapt to a new environment etc..the world will change..you wont be staying at the same point or place for the whole of ur life..

anyway I just received an irrating call from the person whom I least unexpected..I just let it be..dun bother to ans.. bad? :P I dun feel like talking to the BL person..haha..so ya..I am not ur counsellor when u really need someone to talk to then u look 4 me..if my gd friends I surely willing 2 listen lor..but not u.. just not u..U know who u are..I dun want to mention ur name..my friends out there..u know who I am talking abt? yeah u know I know la.. *wink..

I guess I will have to try my best and do watever I can..I dun think I am looking forward to it..but this is life..It always occurs..it make ur life more meaningful?? we do need some time.. 5 to 10 years?? It takes time to be successful but depends on how fast u can do it? I will try, when we r young must do our best b4 we regret that we didnt do our very best when we reach a certain age..yeah..

I guess other things can leave it aside..career lst..every thing needs time to start from stratch..may Father Lord bless that job is successful for me..thanks..end here..

Some updates..

Well I didnt go out today..mm..continue watching 食神 lor..I just catch the last epsiode of 宝家卫国..哈哈..Happy ending..yeah..文忠是帅的咯..not forgetting the rest..macho and handsome too.. :)

Let me update about weekend..I went to a gathering on sat with my ITE ex classmates..Pong, Mas, Fara, Suren, Wati etc..to many to name so I shall not name all..10++ of us..We went to Far East Sakura..

Well this sakura is different as it is not japanese food..哈哈是 thai-chinese cuisine lor..We are surprised or should we say we are sui ku?? lol..The food is moderate..we order dishes n rices..shall not comment so much..coz after all, is the gathering that matters..

I dun intend to go n catch fireworks this year as u know la..人山人海..since the rest want to go, we went with them after the dinner..the view not as gd as last year coz we went there quite late..abt 8 lor..so we stand behind the bridge..fireworks are alright..15 mins..

When it is time to go home..u know pple jam instead of traffic jam
哈哈..it takes us abt 20 mins to cross the road to get to mrt station..warm of course though it rains that day..luckily it didnt rain when the fireworks started..

As for sunday like wat I mention in the previous post, I stayed at home lor..nothing much to blog already

End here..

　

食神...

Today as usual just rest and watch drama..It is acted by 王仁甫 and more..食神 2007咯..He look smart..帅..哈哈..seldom type in chinese so 是慢的咯..I am just trying out..wat a pity I cant use it in messenger..if not it will be more fun u see..to express ourselves lor in chi at times..

Maybe to improve my typing skills for chinese,perhaps I can try to blog in chi next time..opps..
我在干吗? 哈哈..要我用华文来打字会很慢的..I can really understand how it feels when I read Bryan's blog regarding typing in chi..coz we are so used to typing in el..whereby chinese u have to 拼 word by word..unless u use it often, if not it is hard lor..

但是我是不会放弃我的母语的啦,虽然不长写..我还是会读报纸啦..be it mandarin one or EL paper..I feel that we should read both lor..to keep up..yeah..not saying 我很利害 or what..just expressing my point of view..

well I know is very weird to type in el with mixture of chi..but cant be helped..if I were to type all in chinese..it will take ages so ya..mixture..:P
coz some things is best to express them in chi so I will use chi ya..actually nothing much to blog..just blog for fun haha..

End here..

Will I get it??

I am back from interview..haiz..I dun have the confidence though I know I tried my best..I dun even know if I am being selected this time as it is the 2nd round which I never came across..opportunties do come but at the wrong time..I guess I dun put too much hope lor..I will look out 4 other job though I love this job alot..I leave it to fate..I wasnt told if I am selected..I guess they will call me if I am selected..chances?? 50-50 I guess..I cant tell..

I think I just end here..dunno wat else to blog..going have my lunch..ya..

Doughnuts..

For me..is a normal day today as I have not start working..haha..for dear is a holiday..I acc him to collect his mp4 player which was sent for repair..It took so long 2 repair..aiyo..anyway We decided to get the doughnuts from the doughnuts factory which we wanted to buy quite some time ago but due to long queue, we decide not to do so..
Suntec queue not so bad..we queue for abt 30 mins..the doughnuts look very attractive..the taste is alright la..we get 1 dozen n share lor.. :) Just try only for once..Dear drive me back home..luckily drive if not the doughtnut box is so big so troublesome 2 take train..

feeling bloated right now ate dinner and try another doughtnut just now..opps..should not eat lor..sigh..nvm..
Btw Li Wen contacted me this morning and was told to go for 2nd interview on mon..hopefully I get in..

Nothing much to say already..end here

Finally finish it..

Yeah..I just finished reading harry potter bk 7 which is the final bk..well maybe u can say I am slow..I went out etc..so is a bit slow to take two weeks to read?? some pple can finish it within a day..I did not have enough of it, feel like reading somemore though the story ended..hook on the bk..how?? cant be helped, I just have to start reading a new storybk then..if not watch drama series lor..

I just bought two sets of tw drama series..can say is idol types..going 2 start watching them soon..wei xiao pasta and shi shen.crazy right bought two? I dunno which to choose since both seem nice..yeah..plus I can do my crossstitch while I am free..

I waiting for Li Wen's call regarding whether I will be selected..
this kind of thing cant be forced but then I really wish I can get in..partly is so near and partly becoz of the working hrs n the environment r not bad.. leave it to fate..sometime need some luck etc..I tried my best lor.. I hope I will be selected to meet her boss & get in the company..pray that I get in?? hope so..

Btw is Singapore's 42th Birthday..Happy National Day!!
I end here..

Fussy??

Well..I am blogging again..mm..I tried the job for two days and actually realise those pple aint so friendly? force to teach me stuff is it? I dunno lor..V doesnt bother to care after she went through the lst day..how am I suppose to know when I only come for a day???..so I ask alot of questions on the 2nd day..either she asked me to refer to previous ones or ask K.. -_-''' K dunno much, I guess she knows she also wont bother to teach..wat the..I dun wish to say bad things abt pple but the fact is she think she is so great.. so I looking out for other job lor.. yeah..the place not so convenience..though I know there is shuttle bus..troublesome la..if I take my own bus..definitely traffic jam..yeah..so gd luck to me..

I just wish to get the right one at the right time..maybe the place isnt the one or I dun give it a try ar..I really dun like though environment is gd..

k I have 2 end here..going out already..

First day of work!!

Today is the lst day of work..mm..time flies..lst day just past by like that and I learnt some things lor..like clearing fax using loctus notes which is really new to me..open letters n distribute to various depts and have to photocopy newspaper to file them..



I was briefly told of the things that I need to learn and I dunno much abt the company phone..so many buttons lor..I really have no idea..alien?? hhaa..wat else..let me think............



V brought me to various depts to be intro to the colleagues..wow there r really many names to remember..I simply cant remember all..Just try la ar..K just tell V to teach me everything lor while she never teach one..I wonder wat is she busy abt since our boss is away in Tokyo..guess wat.. V & I wore the same blouse.. -_-''' wat a coincidence..mm..haha..weird seem like uniform..



haiz..know wat..V told me she not free to have lunch with me lor..coz acc her bf..sian..I was quite blur n lost lor..thinking huh I have to have lunch alone..luckily I went with a/c dept pple..not so bad..lst day already like that I was like huh..dunno wat to comment..nvm..



So far so gd la..just that I dunno much abt the staff n which dept they r in..so have to work a bit slower to get it..tml have o/s fax to clear..sian lor..try to clear lor..lst thing in the morning lor.. starting I dun feel so gd lor, uneasy normally on the lst day..I feel sian..dunno why just feel this way..I feel unhappy. Hopefully when I get the hang of it..I feel better.

I end here..

Job...

I am happy coz after finding a job for a month,finally I get one.. yeah and it is what I want and taht they can offer me the salary that I want..5 days job..thanks Lord.. :) well the interviewer talked to me etc for quite long after letting me waited for some time..which was quite long lor..she seem very worried abt others knowing my salary..dunno why..kept reminding me of it..weird..wat wrong man?? others get lesser pay or same? I have no idea and dun even need to know ya :P

I am going to start work on thur..horray..frankly speaking I am worried abt it..1st day of work u wont know anything, can be quite blur..there are many things to learn and I dunno if I can handle them..I hope I have the confidence to do them well..that I can finish n go home on time..I dun like to stay long lor.Who likes to do OT anyway? no one.. if I can finish my task..wat for cant go off on time since is already 6pm..agreed? weird pple..

Work load never end if there aint urgent things and that I can finish the work which r urgent, of course knock off on time though..I think is ok la..since I not under agency, is easier for me lor..to continue working or resign.haha

I just wish that I can get along with all of them and handle the tasks well and be happy working there..Hope everything turns out fine and I will be glad as the environment is comfortable..

I am going 2 read Harry Potter.. haaa read quite slow when I am out..I try my best to read as much as I can..Hopefully I can spend some time reading too when I start work..read at night lor..yeah..sometime tend to be sleepy so is a bit hard..k end here..go n read le..hook on the bk once I start to read..hehe..interesting man..cant wait to read til the end..

Sunday..

Well is past 12.. I am back again.. just went to purchase a fan today as mine is spoilt..sigh.. the motor of my previous fan burnt.. -__-''' I went to look around at Courts, Harvey Norman n Carrefour..In the end I get my fan from carrefour lor..well not bad ..Akira brand at afforable price. hhee thx dear for accompanying me and as well as carrying it for me back to my place n fix it lor..My PA?? haha..:P

I didnt really shop today.Just get the necessary items and went home to have dinner..Yeah Mummy cooked today! Since she started working, normally she only cook once per week.I cherish the food alot..yummy! of course we played the strategy game yeah..I beat u n win u.hhaa but u win me for a round ..anyway 2 vs 1 still wins lol.. :P so wat other games that u want to play my dear? haha

Now talk abt something else which I least expected..
He try 2 call me after one month after not contacting each other.. I knew is him so didnt pick up n he left me a voice mail msg...telling me it is him..asking me, I dun want to be frenz with him already ar? call him when free or something like that..cannot hear clearly :P whatever..I dun bother since I get used to not contacting already..

I guess I didnt see wrongly, I saw him at orchard that day..should be doing his work..delivering goods ba..I just avoid it lor..dun wish to see him.. I dunno y I hate to hear from him, so when I receive his call I get angry..What am I? am I a person whom u look for when u need me..when u dun u just dun care abt my feeling.U can say watever u want to protect urself..Pls la..I dun need such friend coz is not worth to be friends though..dun bother..I hope he dun bother me again..I not trying 2 be nasty, y this guy just wont stop bothering me..thought everything is fine, u try to contact me again for wat..Must be quarrelling with her then find a person 2 pour ur sorrows? u have many friends wat..nvm

I dun wish to talk abt that le.Been longwinded..end here..gd night!

Finally got my bk!!

I just decide to go n get harry potter bk 7 which is the final bk..I went to kino n get it today though it rains..I just cant wait..should have bought it early ar? but no hurry wat that's what I thought..it wont fly away..lol..I believe I am not just a follower..I get attracted to the bk when I was studying,heard from friend that it is nice so I went ahead to read and we can borrow it from library..I was happy and read all the bks til bk 6 I bought it..now to the last bk..

Wat a pity..there r spoiler..I dun want to know what happen in the end but somehow find out a little which I dun wish to say..wat a spoiler from newspaper or other form of media.... -_-''' nvm..I just read lor since I bought it..no point telling coz sometime other have not read yet u see..Nvm..

Enough of grumbling abt the bk..now talk abt other stuff..get nag as usual de la..dun want 2 say so much lor..get used..haiz..dunno wat to say leh out of a sudden..sometime dun want to bother friends etc so may either blog to pour out how I feel if not pen it down ba.then I will feel better lor..

Ok la I end here.. I will be alright..tml will be brand new day..wish me gd luck ya?

Have Fun!

We went to celebrate Hui & WL's 21st Birthday in advance today..We met up n went to Mind's cafe..yeah is like pitstop cafe..but the aircon so cold man..omg! We have a two hrs board games..with finger food n drink..not bad..is fun though..I enjoyed myself.It's great to meet up at times and spend time together..is really relaxed there..then went to HK cafe at bugis with WL to have dinner..yummy food yet not expensive..

I feel so happy today..really..though sometime we cant meet up or seldom talk..after all we r friends who meet up..glad to know u guys..as long we have each other in our heart is gd enough..friends ya..

haha I want to get harry potter bk! but dear wants me to finish reading my shopholic bk lst and comics.. :( so when will I finish? hhaa currently reading fern michael's Guest list..this author is nice..I love her stories..interesting..U can find alot of her bks in National library..that is where I came across and start to read her bks..

Though is gd to rest like wat WL says..rest time lor..I still want to get back to my own occupied life soon..enough of rest..while I can rest..I make full use of it..

End here..going read my storybk..

Still waiting..

Well I just dunno why I feel abit unwell this morning..stomach seem to be in pain..gastric? I dunno..left leg ache for a while too..but better now..mm..I should be fine ba..so I guess I am not going anywhere today lor..haiz..

Well I waiting 4 Jojo's call..I feel that if she didnt call at all means no hope lor..I dunno..coz its going to be 3pm..I didnt hear any news from her.. :( well nvm I tried my best though..I must jia you!sometime feel sian since there is no news..when I tried..lead to me feeling lazy liao..opps..

Btw I read abt certain comments regarding some bloggers which u guys will know if u went to take a look..I shall not mention names..though I shouldnt comment so much but just stating my view abt it..stating others as disgusting bloggers r bad..after all, those r pple's blogs..pple shouldnt be so mean as to comment on them and there is no point fighting back too such as saying pple ugly etc..this will lead to no ending..I feel that since it is a personal blog, pple have the right to do wat they like n blog wat they want as long as it isnt unreasonable or obstruct to the law..get wat I mean..so after all it is pple's biz..we dun have to mind so much..if u aint happy abt it..dun go and look at the blog..no one ask u to view it..u can dun view it..agree with me?
No point arguing or wat..simply too free? nothing better to do? childish la..I not saying I am so mature or whatever..really la..childish..

K la I shouldnt comment further..it is none of my biz after all but I see liao buay tahan other critcising pple's blog and even say abt Auntie's blog..bad! I end here

Waiting..

Today I just went lor for that opportunity..I dun have a lot of confidence..but I have tried my best just wait lor..I cant do much but wait for call..that is always the case..haiz..
Mean while I will try my best for others..pls dun pester me la ..I tried my best.. :(

Well today's quite alright..recommended by JOjo lor..really must thanks Hazel for her help..if not I wont get to know jojo ya..
I own Hazel a favour .. :) maybe can ask her out one day..I only know the outcome on fri..so let see lor..

I dunno wat to do tml..rest ba..sometime I know I have bks, comics, newspaper n bible to read..hhaa but seem like not enough time to do all that..I still can do my crossstitch n watch dramas etc..wat did I do the most? I guess is slp ..hhaa n rest nowaday..

Rest is to walk even further in life..I am prepared to start work anytime yeah..

I end here..need to do other stuff..

Simply sian..

Another day has past ya..feeling the same way as usual..I just went to catch Harry Potter with Vin,my cousin Angelia & her bf on sunday..not bad la..I love to watch..hhee we went to tiong bahru plaza..I realise is quite crowded..many pple watched..actually plan 2 go 2 other places 2 catch it but the tickets r almost fully bk with not many seats left..so that's y we went to tiong bahru plaza..

haha..Dear was supposed to help us get tickets..but end up Ivan got it lol..nvm :P thanks Ivan..hehe..Ivan was feeling abit sick though..poor thing but he manage to finish watching the movie b4 he went off..
not a bad thing to have double date? meet up some days again..

Sometime is not that I want to grumble..I dun wish to bottle up how I feel so I will say it out..at times I dun wish to go online so I wont pester u guys so much..or maybe I dun even feel like going online..

sometime we have different views and pple tend to assume how I feel..not saying all of u r doing that..some pple la..not my 3 closer friends though..assuming isnt gd..like ling say..we know ourselves the best..that's true..so I guess I dun have to be bothered by what u said coz that is ur view not mine..it doesnt matter ya..

But pls dun comment or criticise abt pple's religion..I hate it..different pple have diff. beliefs..this is a sensitive topic..but ur dear friend love to do that.he know who he is la..I dun wish to say..I dun like u mixing around with him..but he is ur friend after all..so I dun wish to interfere..he tend to influence u..that is bad..coz it is not a gd influence..maybe I cant click with him and agree with wat he says..doesnt matter either..is ok la..I am still me..ya..u guys can do wat u want..I simply cant interfere much and dun wish to do so in case u say I am a narrow minded person dun let him enjoy etc..

I sound angry? I am not..I just dun like the way he comment abt pple..bad lor..coz is wat he thinks and he assuming lor..not wat I thinking..I dun like..nvm..doesnt matter..

End here..

Sian

As usual nothing much to do lor..I know I have things to keep me occupied but I guess is becoz I lack of something..I hope to get one soon..back to normal life though..hope opportunities will come soon..

I also hope that u and I can understand each other better and everything turns out fine for us.stay happy ya..may god bless u to have a gd health so u wont fall sick easily ya.. :)

My main goal is to grab an opportunity and have a job soon..
Hope to meet up with friends when we r free.. though I may have small circle of friends but I believe that if there r true friends..a few will be gd enough ya..

End Here..

July already..

Time flies and I am back to blogging again..I left the company for a few days already and I guess I am really relaxed but a bit bored..nvm..trying hard to send resume n then go for job interview..I have one on fri..yeah..keppel.. :)

Well frankly speaking..I realise I did know some nice friends when I work..just like in hang ten n PH..we do keep in touch though seldom contact..I know I somehow dun wish to leave? so weird.hhaa
I did have a nice lunch/dinner with u guys..surprise u will ask me out for dinner coz is my last day..fun chatting with u n Sam..realise u aint that quiet..when pple know u..u can chat liao..This is the part whereby pple want to explore abt u hhaa..

Nvm we still can keep in touch..but then u r mushy..I really awake by ur msg..wat miss me..omg! I cant believe is from u..I guess he must be kidding..PH pple all weird weird one..dun fool me n make me happy can? I am not so gd but maybe easy 2 fool?

Father lord help me pls..I dun wish to think so much.I cant control wat they thinking..but he isnt like that last time..wat happen? so weird..I am scared..just want to beware of him..coz I dun want to be treated like a fool again..maybe I think 2 much..let nature takes its course..u guys r my friends..

I end here..

Pursue goals..

Time flies..this is the last week of work..I wondering how am I feeling now..I guess I wont know it as it is of mixed feeling..so excited?..I just wish 2 take a short break n find a new job..
Working in PH mm..can be unhappy but I believe I gain some experiences and get 2 know how to handle certain pple..sometime we just have to move on & stop thinking abt the past..whatever that happens will be the past once I step out of the company..not much of a nice memory..maybe some frenzs which I know ..not so bad..we have each other's contact no..I hope we can keep in touch..

I wish to go n pursue my goals slowly when I am still young..I take a step at a time..some things cant be rushed..it makes things worse.so I am going 2 aim for wat I want..just hope everything is fine..I believe the decision I make regarding resigning wont be wrong..I wish that I can do wat I like n achieve wat I want so I wont regret for the rest of my life..

Of course hope me & Him be fine with each other's company..hope we can understand n love each other more..

May God bless us..I believe he did..thx Father Lord..

A bit fed up

Well..I didnt blog for abt a week..now just update a bit..new staff is here for 3 days and I was supppose to train her..haiz..headache..Mei Yue never care much..some "interesting" things happen..I dun wish to mention them again..maybe it is just a small matter..but it makes me vomit blood..I will just try my best coz I will be leaving soon..1 more week..I wont feel sad or wat..I just feel happy 2 start a new job agan..leave unhappy memories behind..I wasnt that happy over there..I really wish I can find a place where I will be happy working in and a conducive place..

Maybe this place suit the new staff..hhaa wat a trap..Edmund clever 2 say I going to study..since when? this is an excuse..I believe this is wat he says to Mei Yue 2 when the gals want to resign..
hope everything turns out fine..

I end here..dunno wat else to blog..

God's Child

I am back blogging..just come back from church..I was surprised..I accept Jesus..so sudden today..I didnt expect it..I didnt let parents n him know yet..wait til the time is right ya..I guess I will be still me..maybe a better me..ya..
Let me talk abt 1 night cruise trip last sat..well it turned out alright..It is a bit bored though..nothing much..took some pics here n there..ya going develop them..we just have food..explore around, take a look at casino, karaoke lounge to sing songs during midnight hee..have to order drinks though to be able to sing.. I have fun but abit short..it close at 3am..ok la have a gathering with the rest is gd..I leaving the place soon anyway..treat it as a gathering lor..

I think I end here..go n do other stuff..

Company Trip

I am back 2 blog..mm..this few weeks quite occupied on weekend..I just went to 1 night cruise trip with my colleagues on sat..it is gd 2 get together n relax..but quite boring..Star Libra have limited facilities..maybe it is smaller that why..with 9 decks.. :)
I love 2 sing at the lounge.Sam, Elsie, Celina, Me, Min Li, Mei Yue went to sing during 2am hhaa..too bad they close at 3am if not we sing til the sun rise hhaa..We ordered drinks n we can sing lor..

I guess most enjoyable is food ba hhaa..too many 2 choose from so I didnt eat much though..eat til scare.coz we have dinner and we have supper during midnight..u can see everyone is awake still eating lor..hehe Owl wor..this is night life ..yeah..
We should enjoy while we go on trip yeah..not slp in our room hhaa
Mei Yue, Min Li & I share a room while Elise ,Sharon,Andrew etc they all stay next door to door..It is convenience lor to find them..
I will go n develop photos n let colleagues see & choose.. try to get it done soon..yeah..

I guess that's abt all..I dun want to be so longwinded and talk abt it that much..countind down..so end here..

Well Today I feel alright compared to sunday & yesterday..I was really tired on sunday n yesterday..We have a small sec sch gathering at Island resort on sat night..stay over night til sunday..I feel that it wasnt that nice n enjoyable..quite boring..but one thing for sure..sun rise is so beautiful..4 of us, Ker Hisen, Boom Tom , Pei fen & I went to watch sun rise at the jetty..we cycled there in the morning..Boom Tom ride two seat bicycle..I didnt sleep much on sat night..cant get to sleep..chat instead ..slept 1 hr only..haha..

I can see that everyone is so tired and half dead on sunday morning hee...We didnt sleep much the whole night wat..is normal..
This is the lst time I stay overnight..the feeling is gd..to see all my frenzs together..although a small group..not so bad..coz u get to know others better..even though never talk much last time,we will talk already..that is gd..a pity I forget to bring camera 2 the jetty..i left it at the chalet :p anyway I "gain" something ar ..injure my knee.lol..nvm small matter

End here ba..I do my work le..I guess we have another gathering when free..not chalet or bbq le..troublesome..no one ate the food..so sad..

Moody..stress

I dunno why..I just face problems..work n him..make me even more stress..I know I need him at times..when I am down n even when I am happy..but I dun get to meet him ba..he is busy with NDP rehearsal..I am stress..cant u understand..work load so much..u cant comfortable me ar? haiz..I feel like crying at times..too stress til I want to cry..stress then u still treat me coldly at times..dunno wat u doing..maybe I think 2 much? dun want to think le..no mood 2 work sia..thinking of chalet stuff..not that sure how to go..I have bad sense of direction u see..later get lost haaa..jia lat one hor..want to enjoy also have so much problem..staying overnight tml yeah..

I go n do my work ba..end here..I hope I feel better..just blog a bit..looking 4 new job..have job offer but rejected.I want a better environment..I jia you lor..may god bless me.. :)
yeah just relax tml..dun wish 2 think so much..

Worry freak?

I dunno..I feel that our atttiude towards each other changed since so many things happen..maybe dun wish to put in so much hope n effort ba? plus he is quite busy recently..outfield..NDP stuff..he said he dun have much time for me this year..I feel that we can plan de lor..so he say see when free then meet lor. Y he gives such attitude? I guess we need our free space also ..But I dun wish that becoz of that we drift apart, it will be bad..

Recently we quarrel..easy to argue....sigh..temper getting worse..but yesterday's msg was sweet and make me feel secure n happy ba..He meant wat he says? so I am still very impt? He needs to spend time with his frenzs..I understand de..but I guess wont meet for 2-3 weeks..I didnt really tried b4..gonna miss him..sigh..I just find my own programs lor..go church service etc..We need some space yeah..

I not going acc him next week ba coz I dun want to go to his place so often..not gd..u get what I mean? I dun like..he needs rest also..and he says he go church with me..but end up he doesnt want to go..hhaa coz I didnt go n find him?
I just explain how I feel..I really hope he understands..I am a gal..I have my fear also..We r old enough to know wat is right or wrong..but sometime it can be a rash action etc..not that gd u see..

Somehow feel jealous coz I know he meeting a bunch of gals or two gals probably on sat..I guess is normal although I know they r just his frenzs..He said I can join him if I want..I wont want 2 spoil his fun plus I will get jealous lor if they talk n neglect me..hhaa so easily jealous?? is normal wat..I am still alright since I know them..is alright to meet but better dun lie to me lor..trust is very impt..

End here..

Farewell Mr Mike Ho..

Recently..many things happen..sian..We just heard a recent news..that Our sec sch ex physics teacher, Mr Mike Ho CK passed away on sat..is really sad to know it.He is still so young..age of 38..

I remembered Mr Ho as a nice n very patient teacher whereby he will explain things til u understand..although we used to be noisy in class..he was patient..classmates dun appreciate wat he did..but I know some did..We didnt see him for a few years..and didnt know the last time we get to see him is at his wake on mon..this news is really shocking..I heard it from Wei Ling..she msg me..

He is my form teacher when I was in 4N2 which is in Year 2002.Mr Ho looks skinny le..sigh..he is a nice teacher..why he have to die so early..but I guess is better for him now as he went home with the lord..with no suffering n pain..I hope he is happier..in heaven..I believe Jesus will take him with him.. :) rest in peace Mr Ho..I believe u will be glad to know that ur ex students are doing fine..aint u?

We saw our teacher..Mr Devan..he is doing fine..happily married with Ms Cheok..I know he is sad coz Mr Ho & him is like buddies..start to teach together..go out have fun also..even be his best groom when he get married in year 2004..
I am glad we have the chance to pray our last respect..even though he may forget us? I guess he wont.. May god bless of us n Mr Ho..

End here..

What u want?

Seriously I just wish we ignore each other and that's it la.why u bother to call me? luckily my hp is off coz of low batt..I didnt even hear the voice mail til this morning lol..that will make u give up? I thought is Lai Mei..pastor's sis..so I didnt bother..didnt know is u..

I dunno wat else we can say..everything is ruined til like that & I heard some things abt u ,but dunno whether to believe wat I heard..i am in doubt..maybe I see it then I will believe..I know I try hard to forget u..but I didnt although I didnt call u or msg u anymore..u just come to my mind..but wat to do..I cant care so much..I worry alot whenever I am with a person..how I know wat ur motive? dangerous..

Right now I have my bf..I dun wish to think abt other stuff but build up our relationship..sometime I am in doubt as whether single is gd..maybe it is..so I wont get entangled in such stuff..sian..tired u know that..tired whereby the matter doesnt end..he doesnt give up..haiz..do I have to hear wat he has to say? haha MY is right..wait for him to call instead of calling him..here he is calling me le..but I didnt on hp..too bad..I dun think I wish to hear from him anymore..dun want to hear craps.dun make me put in hope la..I very scare it is a trap..so I keep pulling myself away..if he isnt single, I get myself into trouble lor..

End here..

I feel better

I really feel better today..I am on mc today..too tired physically n mentally last night..just went to see doc n rest..yawn.. well maybe we said we wont contact but he really not that heartless..to see me unhappy..still cares for me..I know him..guys can say they wont do that etc..if they r really heartless like someone..maybe I am to blame.I am heartless to him lst..haha..he wont care..

We still keep in touch..kind of chat alot today..msg alot..mm..nan de..for the past few days maybe too sad..we didnt contact much although somehow msg him n saw him online..just dunno wat to say..now just talk like normal lor..
I just feel that God maybe blessing me..to let us talk again..we r frenzs..still care for each other..is normal..I feel that sometime maybe is hard to be frenzs..but there are pple who will do so..just that maybe we cant care so much like we used to be?

It is a matter of time to forget everything..said is easier than done..I will try..try to forget that someone..better not to see him..and better that he dun give me any hope so I can forget him.. just that the more u want to avoid the more u get to meet the person? I saw him at the main door of our company..face to face..I pick up the internal call.is from him..I still see him in the office.is this coincidence? I dunno ..wat to do have to work what..dun want 2 think so much..

I want to pursue my career and studies...bgr is not impt anymore to me & Vin..we lead our own life..relaxed lor..I believe if we r fated, maybe we may be together again..I feel is hard as the pain is so much that he wont want romance..he is silly but I know I am lucky..thx god 4 giving me this bf..maybe we just not fated..

I really feel I am very blessed in life...to have a family ..with my doting mum..really thx my mum for all her care & Concern all this years..although I can be stubborn, talk back at times..and even not spending much time with her..I try to spend more time with her already..She really a lovely mum..if there is a next life.. will be glad to be her daughter again..really thx god for letting me meet my 3 best frenzs..Amelia, Shi Hui & Wei Ling..who are always there whenever I need them..to talk etc..they will be willing 2 listen..I love u guys..

Thanks Vin too..for always being there when I need him..even up to now he still cares for me..such a guy hard to find but maybe not fated..I am not so worth for u to be so gd to me ..I can say u really treat me well..although I am hot tempered at times..we compromise even if we quarrel..not really a big quarrel..we just give n take..either one person apologise and we are fine.I cant deny being happy with u for the past two years..been through a lot n u never leave me..I can only say I feel sorry that I am unfair to u..but u never blame me..thanks for it..

U guys must be thinking wat wrong with me..talk abt all this..I just have this thoughts and want to express how I feel that all..coz life is unpredictable..no one knows when we will leave this world..haha my mum just feel that my thinking quite weird since I went to church service..I change? nope ..I think abt all this all the while..from wat I see..and hear..I just learn to cherish life..but maybe I never cherish relationship..

end here..

Carefree life..

I dunno should I say I am really carefree now and I should feel happy..somehow not that happy..I guess I need to take some time 2 adapt..after all I am so used to being attached..is the end between us..I just let it be.I believe in fate..maybe this path is the best for me..I dun have this kind of life for so long..I want to take a break and concentrate on my work..I want to get a gd career..it takes time and I am still looking 4 it..

Frankly speaking, I guess this is the best way..we can lead our own life.do wat we want without restriction..I love that..I believe that every relationship make us grow up..and learn more things..as long as we dun make stupid mistakes..love cant be forced..

I choose this path..but wat to do..I already choose, cannot regret and then u ignore me..what can I do..I just hope u let me give up totally ..dun call or msg me anymore 2 give me hope if u dun even bother already.. so I can forget u and continue my life..I know is hard..I dun want to bluff myself..I just fall in the well..trying to pull myself out..u know that kind of feeling? then wat abt u ? U like me? I find it hard to ans..u ignore me coz of what? I still get to see u..although u say u dun come up 2 office..haha.. :P u only tolerate 4 two weeks..I know u cant do it la..

Guys r like that..seriously I dunno whether u really like me..I give up coz u dun want to ans my call..b4 that u still msg 2 ask if I call u..I dunno for what..end up I didnt call..I am angry, dunno wat u want to say n afraid I will scold u instead..I already tell u how I feel..is up to u to care or dun care..I dun mind le ..wat can I do..I choose the path le..better for me..leave it to fate..tml is his birthday..but haha he has frenzs to help him celebrate de ba..I dun have to worry..

I just know like someone is so xin ku..I will try to forget u de..slowly ..if we are destined to be together, we will be together de..that is wat I can say..sometime hard to know if a person is playing with u..u have to see 4 urself..

End here..



End here ba..

What's wrong?

I dunno wat I thinking..I just know that my mood is ok today til we talk abt an issue.. sigh..wat is there a big fuss abt it that we can feel unhappy? small matter only..maybe he is stress up & unhappy..small little things he can get fed up..doesnt mean u r not impt to me..u can join me but I know u dun like so I never force u..is it really difficult to compromise..not just god.u, family n frenzs r impt too..

maybe u dun understand how I feel..I know u want me to acc u..I never say I wont pei ni wat..that u claim the time is short..sigh..compromise lor..go on alt sat..wat 2 do..relationship is a give n take one..but I believe u love me, u respect wat I did right? now u know how i feel when u put work at the very lst priority that u almost neglect me..I really not happy..is the same thing..now u know..

I feel this is only a small matter..wat u concern actually isnt this..is more than that..I know u..I been together with u..I know how u feel..but sometime is also hard to know wat guys r thinking..
what to do..sigh..

end here..

Still cant forget..

I dun want to think abt u..but u keep coming 2 my mind..is unfair..I feel alright..til I saw u drive past me today..u act as if u never see me I guess..I dun want de..but I just happen to see u..sian..I rather I dun see u ba..then I wont feel sad..I dunno why I hope to see u..but when I see u.I feel sad..I am just reminded of wat happen..I cannot forget!!! I am that kind who can remember things de for so very long or even cant forget..like I saw Hang ten..I am reminded of stuff..so hurt n sad abt wat I did..haiz..but now dun really think of it..

Nvm I need time..and perhaps u or I leave the company ,it will be fine..slowly fade..better? I just want to enjoy myself today and feel happy that I have my dear beside me..dote n love me no matter wat happen.I am unfair to him..I will treat him even better..coz I know I love him..just that I cant get over wat happen..sigh..I really need time..time can heal everything ba..

End here..

Mon Blues..

Today just feel sian..dun feel like doing any work but have to work..so I just do my work seriously..maybe I think alot..still reminded of him..wat to do..unless I leave this company..still wonder why is he not here..lol..silly hor? I shouldnt do that..I stopping myself le from contacting him..coz he already told me not to ...I know..like that we can forget each other ? u really want to do that?

I still treat u as frenz wat..dun have to do til like that ba..now building my relationship..we need some time..I already get back those feeling together..but hope it will be even better..hope everything turns out fine..I am bad..can do this and yet he forgives me..sigh..I am unfair hor..I hope this is the last time..we cant take it if there is another such test..sigh..maybe is all fated..if there r problems, end up we r still together..maybe is fate..I dunno still early to tell? who knows wat happen..I just hope we two can have a gd relationship n walk on til old..but right now I dun want to think abt that.career is impt to me lst..then studies..earn money first..if not cant even think of other stuff..

End here..

Settled & hope things turn out fine

Everything is back to normal..and Dear told me how he feels..our ship is nearly sinking again..but right now we trying to save it again..hopefully I will be fair..he told me if I think he not the ideal guy, tell him earlier..I believe he is..just that I am so soft hearted..Sorry dear for hurting u ..haiz I am a bad gal..

Father lord, I really hope n pray that my heart wont waver and that we r happy together..he is gd to me n dote me..if I give him up, I am really a fool..maybe my guy is just right beside me..I dunno how to cherish..hurt him..r u telling me he is the one?? although some things I cant accept..but no one is perfect..I know that..
I just wish to have someone who love me truely n dote me n my family..to be able to share my burden..regardless of happiness or saddness..have a flat..help me in housework, down to earth..did I ask alot?

I get back the feeling yesterday..have fun n of course really a bit down yesterday til a very big extreme..that I dun want 2 mention anymore..

I went to sentosa with dear..took cable car..the feeling is gd..took some pics at vivo n sentosa..rainy day wor..we went to pasta mania n have dinner..hhee..he treat me lunch so I treat him for dinner..:) been spending quite alot of money this week..have to save a little..
anyway life is to enjoy at times..I mean cannot be spendthrift but then sometime I want to enjoy life..a little..like drinking or having some food that I like..after all we work so hard..agree?

Right now we just see if we can stable our relationship after he ord..and I get other job n studied..this is a test for us..that this is a test..if we can get through..mm..more or less know we can settle down..soon..

Now I just wish to work hard and get a better job..career is impt..no career,other things we can lay aside lor..end here..

Just want to be alone..

I dunno ..I feel miserable ba..I feel unhappy although things r settled..Sorry D..I hurt u..wat I said also no use..nothing is fair in this world..u have to forget me..I know I have a bit feeling for u.I just dun dare to face it..I fear for the future..I feel that i dun suit u really..sorry being unfair..I am afraid I love u temp. or wat..is unfair to u..so I rather never start ba..sorry..I really dunno how to face u when I see u..I know wo zai hu ni..yet I stop myself from falling in..haiz..why? love is so complicated..

I just cant overcome this..it making me collasping..maybe u guys will say I stupid n silly..my mind n body really tired..give me a break can? I know dear u r beside me..sometime I also need to take a break..know u understand n wont disturb me..I just want 2 be alone now..I really dun feel happy this two months..D u think is ur fault..is not.dun blame urself..if u didnt ask..others may ask..still the same.. I just hope u can find ur ideal gal.and settle down..u r not young le..

End here..may god bless u..I believe he will..wish u happiness..

What I want?

Frenz say me is true..I really dunno what I want..or maybe I know what I want but I am afraid to face it..so never make empty promise..i cant say I dun feel happy with u..is that my heart just waiver..why is that so? I dun dare to face how I feel..I can say is my problem..even if he doesnt appear..there may be problems..I guess is all my fault..
Maybe I should just be left alone..better for me? choose wat I want? then end up cannot find then forget it lor..single..is that what I want? I dun want to hurt u two..

Seriously y I worry abt u not coming to work? I cant figure out how I feel towards u..is it like? I just feel so comfortable talking to u n going out with u..I dun feel any stress..but recently talk to u..I guess we r giving each other attitude le..why is that so? then u can feel I am a bad person..I worry when u didnt on ur hp..or ans the call..I scare something happen to u..coz I care right? I dun have to do that right? but why? frenz dun do that..I am doing more than that le..

I dun want to regret wat decision I make..frankly speaking Dear I know u r gd to me since we r together for so long..maybe I demand too much..that I go out with u..I tend to be unhappy when I dun wish to..how come? I mean when there isnt some romantic stuff but u r true to me..u love me for who I am..u forgive me for what I do..if is me, will I do the same? this is a gd question..

I also dun dare to get into a new relationship although I do say I did like u a little..but wat kind of like is that? end up I find u not suitable..break with u no point lor..I dun have the confidence..beside there is alot to consider..why must I think so much..like pple will say just do what u think is right..I dunno u well..maybe I doesnt suit u..i think u forget me ba..

Frankly speaking if I knew this will happen again..coz no sparks etc..i shouldnt patch back with u..then we can have our own life.isnt it better? maybe u can find someone whom u truely love n she truely love u..I am being unfair to u..maybe I haven find the one who will let my heart stay firm..still young so I tend to choose..
Is my expectation too high?

End here..

I really dunno what's wrong with u..sometime u will ans call, sometime u wont..then u claim u r slping..really? then when u call me I must ans? not fair leh..maybe we r just denying how we feel..I just dun dare to face it..I know is unfair..then I react in that kind of tone last night coz I care n worried ..I know ur gum hurts so ur mood isnt that gd..I cant help caring for u & I am worried which makes me worry why..I can bluff others but not myself..I know how I feel..is just that I dunno how to face it..so I just let it be..

I dun want to hurt u or others..I been bluffing myself..bluff myself that I treat u as frenz..but the concern between us seem more than that..is unfair to him..but I really dun care so much abt him..which is bad..my heart isnt firm after all..I scare I hurt u also..I think alot..worry this n that..so I just let nature takes its course..

I been thinking u claim that u dun have gf.really or not? I just want to take a step at a time , be ur frenz n go out have fun..know each other better then come n say lor..
u ask me if I mind the age gap..frankly speaking I do mind but sometime certain things when u r in it..u wont mind anymore..
I wonder if u r serious with me..is comfortable to talk to u..and shop around..can u tell me how u feel towards me?

End here..

Moody..

Seriously I am quiet today..maybe abit siao siao also..but deep in my heart, I dun feel happy..I guess I think 2 much..sorry I have to make u disappointed coz is really not the right time nor right way to agree..I know I feel bad and I cant hide my feeling that I admire u a little..but then maybe it isnt that much like what I think..I worried abt u, I care for u..

I dunno why..but right now..I have him le..so I wont want to think so much..so I clarify le last night and let nature takes its course lor..dun want to create misunderstanding n trouble which will make us miserable..

I dun mind being ur friend..nice to chat with..dunno why we just can click.let's take a step at a time..just be friends ba...I wont want to think so much....I mean u want to know it so fast..so sudden but I answered u..haiz...wat to do..I dun want to bluff myself n u..frankly speaking I have been trying 2 bluff myself..but I know myself..
Making myself unhappy etc when I think too much..haiz..

Dear I just thought of u so I got my answer..end here..

Confused

I dunno why..some pple tend 2 be playing or serious? I dunno..just find them fan at times.be friends is aright..seriously I dun mind going out together as a group..not more than that..I am not that gd as u guys might think..I have temper etc..right now I have him, is gd enough..I dun want to think abt what happen in the past & hope it wont repeat..my dear friends who r reading this..u know , I know wat I talking abt..

haiz..sometime it just comes..dunno why..I not showing off..just writing down my thoughts..out of a sudden They want to take my hp no.. dunno what they up to..so weird..I mean for so long then they take..I dun mind exchanging no. but dun disturb me will be gd enough..I just feel confused and pai seh when I see them..dunno how to face them..I just pretend to be normal but I know I am not..maybe I think 2 much? but from what I see, I feel that it isn't so simple..

End here..

Tired weekends

I am back to work after stock take..wow been tired this few days..stay til 10 plus on last fri and 9 plus on sat..Sat was quite free in the sense that we can have a chat and just do wat we want..like no body biz? haaaa..coz nothing to do ..wat u expect us to do? stare blankly at the wall? so We just do wat We like..luckily I can rest yesterday..I was tired..hhaa was watching dvd til quite late too on sat..I just want to relax myself..enjoy the drama and slp at 2am :P so u guys must be telling me, I shouldnt complain I am tired right? haa..currently I am catching hua yang shao nian shao nu, I want to get the part 3!! Cant wait to watch..

Quan is so handsome and finally have frenz who agree with me.. hhaaa..usually I think is handsome, others wont think so..hhaa they will say ok , or so so..hhaa
Ling thanks for agreeing with me haa.. This Brunei Guy, although his brunei accent abit weird, but his chi is gd enough for a Brunei Guy..

My weekend is gone just like that but once a year only , which is fine..I haven see Dear yet since CNY..didnt meet him for a week..miss him? I still feel alright, maybe too tired and occupied..dun have the feeling of missing him too much..how come?

End here ..

Chinese New Year

I am back again..hhee..it is still CNY..I just talk abt my CNY..Nothing much though..

I went to both ah ma's house as usual on the lst day of CNY.. I didnt get a huge amt of hong bao.still alright..2nd day went to Vin's house and he came to my house too..then we have steamboat for dinner at my place.. :)he can acc me to have dinner..
3rd day sian ..Wei Ling came to my house and we decide to watch "Just follow law" directed by Jack Neo..It is so funny..and full house lor..we plan to watch 2.15 slot but not enough tickets..left two tickets but my younger bro catching it with us..so we went to watch at 5.50 istead..We went swedsen to have earthquake ice cream n then head down to my house..after that we catch the movie..

I met WL thrice last week..hhaa miss each other too much? just kidding..I went out last sat n sun too..sat went to YY's 21st birthday at costa sand pasir ris..nothing much also..a bit sian..but she invited me so I just went..Sunday went WL's house bai nian with Ling & SH..then we dunno where to go either so stay at my house lor have a chat ..eat goodies..Mum wasnt in de..but nvm..coz they are my best frenz..We did have fun although just simply chatting..is gd.. :) as usual We tease Amelia lor regarding pri 6 incident hhaa..which I wont mention here..secret among us :P

Nothing much to do at work as stock take is coming..after that can faint haiz..end here la

I am back again..Didnt blog abt a week..busy busy busy when CNY is around the corner..alot of work to do..

Anyway I bought Nian huo le..wow can spend alot on that..now leave bak kwa, going pay ah yi 4 ordering 4 us...once a year is alright..
Still have to get drinks..nvm downstair sells them..

I just went 2 Chinatown after going Vivo City 2 feel the CNY atmosphere on sat..so crowded..
Too bad camera no batt cant take pics..sob..didnt check, and this is wat happen ar dear..hhaaa

Anyway I got him a cookie cake from Famous Amos for V day..Birthday gift, given le..a polo shirt for CNY yeah..haiz..V day n his birthday so near no gd..lol..have to get so many things..kidding..
Anyway there is a card made by me..
I do hope he really love wat I give.

Thinking of getting 1 more top and get a shoe or something 2 go along with my dress.. :) hhee happy that I can see him tml..thought I wont be able to..but no plans at all as I thought we wont celebrate lor..anyway we can have a simple meal ..and beside we kind of celebrate on sat..I treat him food..so is ok..

Like wat pple will say, if u r lovely and has a stable relationship, everday is V Day..I agree..doesnt have to be on 14 feb right?

K end here and going do my work & go shopping again after work..busy CNY period wor..

Tiring Sat..

I am back again blogging..I feel sleepy today and I can say is very tired after having our company dinner last night..We went to Yen Place at chinatown n have dinner..

It is quite fun.guess wat Jean end up sit with us.I didnt expect her to sit with us..I guess no seats already that's why..Boss naughty haaa..He can get really fun joking with us n enjoying with us..is gd..have a gd relationship..We get very high wor..hhaaa not taking pills ar..lol
We have Karaoke session to go with the dinner..I sang 1 song with Jasyln..bei ji xue.. :)
Ah seng really can sing..not bad..

I tried red wine again..Boss naughty..we ordered soft drinks & he replaces the soft drink with red wine instead ..dun let us drink soft drink..hhaaa..I cant drink alot..I dun drink wine de..So I guess I get abit drunk last night hhaa..a bit blur blur..tired lor..I dunno..

I know dear u are worried but dun worry I am fine.. :) still manage to get home and I know how to get home hhaa..
I enjoyed myself..left at 10pm..as today we have to work wat..if not I stay longer..dun feel like going off lor..

Anyway meeting dear later..k go n do my things..enough of last night..end here..