5th day..

Time flies and it is 5th day of CNY..still on leave..I went to Mum's boss house on 2nd day and went to WL & Queenie's house on the 3rd day.We even went to river hongbao..Boss & colleagues coming over to my place tml and we will be going over to boss's house too..somehow I dun feel like going though. sigh

I believe you must be unhappy coz I didnt turn up today..well is alright, you can tell me logic stuff all you want or even tell me off. Is up to you.. I will tolerate..
Think a lot as in why do I come in the first place.. I believe it is a test for me.leave everything to GOD..what goes around comes around!!! don't be too much, you will get it some days! you wait and see..I am not threatening..GOd knows all..

I really don't know how and what should I do then you can be satisfied..the best way is always to open the door and leave..to you, is escaping..to me is not.. I am just a tool which can be used and once I am of no value, you will throw me aside or away..I am just a tool whereby you can get by paying..that's how impt I am ar! bull shit!

I know I am not suppose to talk n think this way as it is still CNY..should be happy isn't it..But I just feel this way, not trying to be too personal abt it but it is the fact and the truth..who do you think I am?? the old me? the one who run when you ask me to run..I am not a dog! I know I learnt a lot but you know, you bring me alot of anger, tears which I never experience b4..that's how terrible it is..I really hate men especially after working with you..I hate men more..you men think you are so great ar?? don't try to be funny and think that I can be bullied or bluff..you try la..I am not the old me! that I will keep quiet and say nothing about it.. I don't wanna be too much and do nasty things..coz I feel that I will let Father Lord down if I do it..GOD knows all..I tolerate.. let GOD handle everything..hopefully I can be more forgiving..
Men always make me upset..so what is so great about men..
I don't know..It's getting even harder for me to accept le..

end here..gonna get dinner..I don't wanna think so much..gonna study later..